A couple of nights ago, at the Sassafras Gap Shelter, a bear got into the shelter and ripped open a hiker’s sleeping bag. No, just kidding. It got into the shelter, and ripped open someone’s food bag that they forgot to hang. No, just kidding. It was really a skunk that was rummaging in the food bag, and it sprayed 3 or 4 people’s sleeping bags. Poor them! No, just kidding. It didn’t spray, it just ate someone’s oatmeal. No, just kidding. There really wasn’t an animal problem at all.
The real problem was that I slipped over a rocky ledge, and fractured my left tibia. No, just kidding. It was really Melissa, and she only sprained her ankle. Good thing we have an Ace bandage and a lot of duct tape. She’ll be OK in a few days. No, just kidding. It was really me, and what happened is that I slipped while filtering water from the stream, and hit my head on a rock. It bled a little while, but we fixed it with Super Glue and duct tape. No, just kidding. I did hit my head on a rock, but the only thing that happened was that it knocked my new filling out (yep, the one Dr. P. just put in over my root canal a couple of days before I left home). No, just kidding. The filling is fine. We really don’t have any bodily injuries at all, and my feet are MUCH better now. I have no real blisters anymore; my feet have toughened up nicely. We’re powdering our feet morning and night with Gold Bond Powder. We love the menthol. For a minute or two, we can’t smell our own body odor!
The only disaster that really happened is that this computer at the Fontana Lodge in the Fontana Village doesn’t allow us to load any pictures! It has a USB port, but I can’t get it to work with my card reader.
Alas! Oh, well. At least there are no bears in this place! No, just kidding. Actually, there’s one coming at me from across the lobby! It’s near the fireplace now! It’s about to …